Discussing suicide in the workplace – A guide for managers

Supporting employees you think may feel suicidal, and supporting your team members when a colleague, family member or friend dies from suicide.

Last Modified: 8 October 2024

Content warning: This resource discusses various aspects of suicide and bereavement. You can find a list of organisations that offer support for suicide and bereavement in the ‘Further information’ section of this page.

Introduction

The information in this resource refers to UK statistics and resources. However, much of the information within it will be relevant in any country. If you are based outside the UK, we suggest making a list of equivalent sources of support for your area for quick and easy reference. 

This resource is intended to help managers: 

  • Prepare a practical plan and resource pack,
  • Prepare for conversations about suicide with team members,
  • Support employees in the workplace who may be considering suicide,
  • Supporting team members after a colleague, family member or friend has died from suicide. 

This resource should be used with the details in the ‘Further information’ section and those for your organisation, country or region. 

This resource does not cover detailed information on: 

  • Causes and the methods of suicide,
  • Signs that someone may be feeling suicidal,
  • Crisis management,
  • Specific higher risk groups,
  • Specific industries and job roles such as construction, justice, security, and transport.

There are many resources which cover this information in much more detail. You can find information on these in the ‘Further information’ section.

Many industry bodies also have industry-specific guidance on these topics on their websites. 

Statistics on suicide

Statistics from the UK Office of National Statistics (ONS) showed that, in 2023: 

  • There were 6,069 suicides registered in England and Wales (11.4 deaths per 100,000 people). This is an increase from 2022 (10.7 deaths per 100,000, or 5,642 deaths) and the highest rate seen since 1999. 
  • The male suicide rate in England and Wales increased to 17.4 deaths per 100,000 in 2023, from 16.4 deaths per 100,000 in 2022; this is the highest rate for males since 1999.
  • The female suicide rate in England and Wales increased to 5.7 deaths per 100,000 in 2023, from 5.4 deaths per 100,000 in 2022; this is the highest rate for females since 1994.
  • The male age group with the highest suicide rate was 45 to 49 years (25.5 deaths per 100,000). 
  • The female age group with the highest suicide rate was 50 to 54 years (9.2 deaths per 100,000). 

ONS data for the period 2001-2018 on the leading causes of death per age group shows that ‘suicide and injury or poisoning of undermined intent’ was the leading cause of death for people aged under 35: 

  • Males (27.1 per cent) 
  • Females (16.7 per cent).

Who can suicide affect?

Suicide can affect people of any age or situation in life. The statistics given above, however, suggest that age and gender are potential risk factors. Other known influences are culture, identity, pre-existing physical and mental health conditions, access to support networks, financial and family situations.

There are different methods of suicide and reasons behind the action. Some are meticulously planned, while others appear to be more spontaneous. In most cases, there is a combination of multiple factors. For example – severe chronic pain, unemployment, and financial worries.

Each person’s decision to end their life is unique, and each is a tragedy which impacts a wide range of people. 

It is rare for someone to take their own life at work. They are more likely to act in their own time. 

What you can do to reduce the risk of suicide in your team

Suicide is often due to a combination of circumstances occurring at one time. As a manager, you can try to reduce the risk of work being a factor, and even make work a source of support. There are several ways that you can do this:

  • Cultivate a culture of support where employees and colleagues feel comfortable and safe discussing their mental health and what’s going on in their lives. This can be with their colleagues and managers. 
  • Be known for respecting confidentiality and being empathetic. This is for the employee who is unwell and for those reporting concerns about a colleague to you. 
  • Learn to be an active listener, and act on promises promptly. 
  • Make sure that employees know where and how to access support, such as Employee Assistance Programmes (EAP) and the Samaritans. This can be through regular health promotion and leaflet campaigns, toolbox talks, and reminders to all staff in emails or payslips. 
  • Know your team, and be alert to changes in people’s behaviours during stressful times at work (and in their personal life if you know about it). A change is a good indicator that something might be wrong. Our resource, ‘Spotting the signs an employee is struggling with mental health,’ has more information.
  • If you think something is not right, speak to the person and ask them. Showing you care can save a life. Our resource, ‘Having sensitive conversations,’ has more information.

Examples of work situations which may increase risk of suicidal feelings

  • Moving to a more senior role, especially if it involves longer hours or travel. 
  • Working in a new location, including country. 
  • Remote working.
  • Working offshore or overseas, particularly when there is family illness or stress at home.
  • Prolonged periods away from home.
  • Not getting on with colleagues.
  • Job loss – redundancy or dismissal.
  • Not coping with the requirements of their role.
  • Financial circumstances.
  • High pressure roles – for example, healthcare workings during wars and pandemics.
  • Transitions – for example, a former member of the Armed Forces transitioning to civilian life.
  • Losing a friend or family member, especially if they took their own life.
  • Loneliness.
  • Delayed or lack of support and adjustments for health and disabilities.
  • Being unable to carry out job due to health condition – for example, a new disability or a terminal illness.

Be prepared

Having a plan, resources, and being prepared are important. You may never need them, but knowing you have them will take the pressure off you and guide you through.

The topic may arise in situations such as:

  • Regular review meetings,
  • As an answer to a daily ‘how are you?’ in a kitchen or other social space,
  • As part of a formal one-to-one meeting,
  • When you realise that something is wrong.

Always carry a pen and notebook with you, and ideally a phone. You can use these to:

  • Give someone important numbers and other information,
  • Cancel any meetings you have,
  • Contact relevant support services (such as 999 emergency support or their GP),
  • Access your information page and any relevant workplace pages for you or the individual,
  • Take down contact details and other useful information from the individual.

Have a plan

Having a pre-prepared plan or guide list can be very helpful in rare, but stressful, situations. They can help you compose your thoughts and remind you of key information to ask and to give. Below are some things you may want to include: 

  • Steps you may need to go through,
  • Questions to ask, and wording if that helps,
  • A list of information you need,
  • Key contact information – contract taxi, correct address for site (for ambulance), manager and HR, Occupational Health if needed, 
  • List of specialist organisations for help – for example the NHS or Samaritans,
  • Relevant workplace procedures for this situation,
  • Who you need to contact – such as family members, their GP, or HR,
  • Key policies and procedures,
  • Consent to pass on information to relevant people (where possible). 

Have information to hand for an employee 

Have a document (printed and online) which lists useful contacts you can give to the individual. Information you may want to include: 

  • Agencies who specialise in acute mental health situations – for example, Samaritans,
  • Work contact details – yours and HR,
  • Details of your EAP, 
  • A few sentences to remind them you want to support them and that they are not alone,
  • A list of ways work can help them. Remember to add links or information on how to access this support. 

Training 

It can be useful for managers to have training in spotting the signs and how to manage situations, especially areas of higher risk and where a colleague has taken their life. This can be provided by specialist organisations or your OH provider. A number of organisations that offer training can be found in the ‘Further information’ section.

Talking to an employee you think could be feeling suicidal

Talking about suicide and asking someone about suicidal feelings can feel daunting and uncomfortable. That is normal but should not stop you. Talking about it is important and can save a person’s life.

When someone raises self-harm or that they are having suicidal thoughts with you, they should instantly become your number one priority. Take what they say very seriously. 

Treat the person the same way that you would want to be treated, or how you know works best for the person. Be kind, genuine, and do not judge them or what they are saying.

Starting the conversation

  • Find a private space such as a meeting room and make sure you will not be disturbed. Sticky notes on the door can be very useful here.
  • If you need to, tell them you are going to quickly email/call someone to cancel your next meeting and to make sure you will not be disturbed.
  • Give the person your full attention. 
  • Let them know you care and that they are your top priority. Often people who are contemplating suicide feel nobody cares about them, so knowing you do helps. 
  • Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Ask direct questions calmly, such as: 
    • Are you having any suicidal thoughts? 
    • Are you thinking about ending your life? 
    • Why? 
    • Have you made a plan? 
    • Can you tell me about it? 
    • What or who would help you change your mind? This might be a key person or pet in their life. You may wish to expand on this and discuss it at length. 

How to ask questions

Asking direct questions often helps people talk and reduce the risk of them following through with any suicidal intentions. It shows that you care and are open to having a potentially difficult conversation.

Asking direct questions also helps give you the information you need to take the next steps. 

  • Let them know that their colleagues care about them and what everyone values about them and that they would be greatly missed. 
  • Always be honest, sincere and use your own words. They will be acutely aware of anything that is not genuine.

What to do during the conversation

  • Work with them and agree a plan with them for the next steps. Remember to promise only what you can deliver. If they are having suicidal thoughts but are not in immediate danger, then offer to help them contact their GP for an urgent appointment. If they are already under the care of mental health services, then they may have a contact either you or they can contact. Ask if they have a crisis plan which can be followed. Try not to leave them alone.
  • Be prepared to contact a GP or key contact on a person’s behalf. They might want help but not feel able to ask themselves. Do this with the person there and discuss what you plan to say with them in advance. 
  • They may wish to talk to specialist organisations who can help them, such as the Samaritans. They may wish privacy to do this, and you should try to enable this. Leave the room but stay close in case they need you, and to let you know when they have finished their call. 
  • Give them relevant contact details and ask them to contact you. Tell them that you want to contact them later to make sure they are alright. Say you will phone, but they can reply by email, text or voice message if they don’t want to talk to you. Give them the next steps, but keep it simple. Let them know you are there for them. 
  • If you feel you need advice from a health professional, call the NHS line 111 or your country equivalent.
  • If you feel there is an imminent risk to the person’s life, contact emergency services and other key people such as a First Aider or Mental Health First Aider. Do not leave the person alone. 

What to do after a suicide that affects your team

Losing a colleague, family member or friend is hard, even if it is expected. When it is unexpected, traumatic or due to suicide it can make it even more difficult. 

Suicide impacts people in different ways and at different times. For some people, it will trigger memories of people they have lost to suicide during their lifetime. For others, it may bring back memories of their personal experiences of suicidal thoughts or attempts. Others may be at a different stage of the same journey.

There may be some who have lost friends and family in the past to suicide and the suicide of a colleague, or seeing a colleague experience the same thing may bring back painful memories and emotions. 

People may show different emotions, such as anger at the person for what they have done, sadness, or wanting to block it out, as it is too painful to process. 

Some people will be angry and blame work for the suicide – if there is a justifiable reason, then that should be investigated promptly by HR. If not, just listen. Correct any wrong information gently (without breaching confidentiality). 

You can find more information on the grieving process in our resource, ‘Grief, disability and mental health.’

Managing feelings of guilt following a suicide

The end of a person’s life raises a range of emotions for those left behind. When it is due to suicide, there are usually additional emotions and questions. The people who knew them are often left wondering: 

  • Did they miss any signs that may have alerted them to the person’s intentions? 
  • Was there anything they could have done to help the person before they reached this stage?
  • Did they say or do something that contributed to the person taking their own life? 

These emotions and questions are all normal and natural reactions. 

There are usually many factors that lead to a person taking their own life, including many not known to those around them, including work colleagues. Changes in behaviours often develop over time. It is only looking back that the signs may be seen, and even then, they can be subtle.

It is important for everyone to remember that, when someone dies from suicide, it is not anybody’s fault and people should not blame themselves.

Invite your team to talk to you, your EAP, or external agencies such as their GP or organisations listed in the ‘Further information’ section. EAP professionals will be able to help them with these feelings. 

Practical steps managers can take after a suicide

Compassionate leave

Share details of your organisation’s leave policy. As a manager, you may have discretion about when employees can use compassionate leave if policies allow for it.

Temporary adjustments

Recognising that colleagues need time to grieve is important. They may not be quite as focused on their work and may need adjustments, flexibility and support during this period. If they are in a safety critical role, they may benefit from being temporarily removed from it, if this is possible. 

Appointments

Enabling time off to attend Employee Assistance Programme (EAP) counselling. Make sure that everyone has access to information on EAP and other services. 

Attending the funeral

Let as many of the team attend the funeral as able. As a manager, you should go if possible. Funerals are a way for people to say their goodbyes and support family and friends. They help people cope with the grief and an act of showing they care for the person that has gone. 

If it is not possible for everyone to attend due to capacity or similar issues, consider alternatives, such as a memorial collection for those unable to attend. 

Time to talk

Offering an extra team coffee breaks to discuss what has happened can be helpful for some. Not everyone will want to take part and that is fine.

Some may want to talk privately to you or to a close colleague – time for that should be encouraged. For some, it may be several days, weeks or months or later that they need support. 

It is important that you don’t forget the person who has gone. Saying you miss them, remembering them publicly such as ‘I hope they are at peace now – I miss their team banter’ can help others. 

If someone has lost a family member or friend who is not related to work, step up regular reviews to check they are ok, and give them an opportunity to talk about the person they have lost if they want to. Ask if they want details of organisations that they can contact.

Do something positive

This may be raising money for a charity that the person supported or for a charity related to suicide. 

It maybe that an awareness event or support system can be set up throughout the organisation. 

You may also consider doing something to honour the person who died. Doing something positive at a time that feels right for and chosen by the team can help with grieving. Nobody should feel under pressure to be involved, however. 

Contact with the family

You should also be in contact with the family offering any support work can give, answering any questions as able, and returning any personal effects. You should work with HR on this. 

Police investigations

If a member of your team takes their own life, you may be interviewed by the police as part of their routine investigation to answer the many questions that arise from suicide.

Have everything documented and ask HR for help. Although it may be stressful, it may help you, the team, and the person’s family find answers and come to terms with what has happened. It is one of the final things you can do for the person. 

Looking after yourself

As a manager, you should also have sources of support available to you. It can be easy to neglect your feelings as you try to support everyone around you. By looking after yourself, you will be able to be there for your team as well. Also, if they know you are doing that, they will feel more comfortable about doing the same. 

Remember that EAP and external services are there for you too. Access them if you need to. 

You may need to take some compassionate leave and set boundaries to protect your health and wellbeing. Your manager and HR should be able to support you with this. 

Further information

There are several national and local organisations that have very useful information on identifying risk factors, signs that someone may be at risk of suicide, and how to support someone.

Samaritans 

The Samaritans provide confidential emotional support 24 hours a day. In some areas, they have local branches where you visit in person. They can be contacted by phone, email or letter. 

They have resources for organisations and individuals, including how to recognise the signs, causes, how to offer support, and training programmes. 

Stay Alive app 

Stay Alive app is a suicide prevention resource for the UK. It gives information to help individuals stay safe if they are having suicidal thoughts. It can also be used by people who are concerned about someone else who may be considering suicide.

It contains a safety plan, customisable reasons for living, and a ‘life box’ where a person can store photos that are important to them.

Saneline (text and online support) 

Saneline works with anyone affected by mental illness, including families, friends and carers. They also provide a free text-based support service (Textcare), and an online supportive forum community where anyone can share their experiences of mental health. 

CALM (The Campaign Against Living Miserably) 

CALM offers accredited confidential, anonymous and free support, information and signposting to people in the UK through their helpline and webchat service.

SOS Silence 

SOS Silence supports anyone affected by suicide, whether they are having suicidal thoughts, have attempted suicide, or are bereaved. 

They have a listening support service, and in-person support groups.

PAPYRUS (prevention of young suicide of those under 35) 

PAPYRUS supports people under the age of 35 and anyone who is concerned that a person under 35 might be suicidal. They also have some resources.

The Mix (for people under 25) 

The Mix offers a free call service and can help individuals find organisations that may be able to offer further help. 

Shout (Text service) 

Shout can help with urgent issues such as suicidal thoughts, abuse, assault, self-harm, bullying and relationship challenges. 

SupportLine 

Offers confidential emotional support by telephone, email, and post. 

Rethink 

Rethink has resources for organisations and individuals, including how to recognise the signs, causes, and how to offer support. 

Mental Health UK 

Resources and information about suicide for family and friends. 

BDF Mental Health Toolkit 

Our selection of resources for managers and employers about promoting mental wellbeing.

If you require this content in a different format, contact enquiries@businessdisabilityforum.org.uk.

© This resource and the information contained therein are subject to copyright and remain the property of the Business Disability Forum. They are for reference only and must not be copied or distributed without prior permission.

Related Posts

Bookmark (0)
Please login to bookmarkClose